Whose marriage is it really?

So it is 10:51 pm and I got home about an hour and a half ago. On my way home I was listening to a podcast that I downloaded from blog talk radio by Vera, and the topic up for discussion was "Why should I get married". This was an extremely thought provoking conversation and I am so disappointed that I did not have the opportunity to call in. So I figured I would give my thoughts really quick.

A few people who participated in the discussion, raised some interesting points regarding marriage. The point that comes to mind, however,

was

one that was raised by a single lady. She stated that she really did not think marriage was worth it, because she had seen so many people's marriages that had failed or were not model marriages. In essence marriage was not a great thing. (Granted this is not the direct quote, but that was the general idea.) If I had the opportunity to call in, this would have been my response to her comment.

After being married for almost six years now, there is one thing I know for sure. Marriage is a challenge and each day takes a lot off work and commitment. And though it is vital for married couples or even single people to have marriages they admire or look up to, basing your whole perception of marriage on other people's lives is incorrect for many reasons. For one people are emotional beings and fall short in their life walk. And even when they do not want to disappoint their admirers, parents, observers and even themselves, disappointment happens. So as opposed to single people and married people basing their lives or relationships on how other people live or conduct their marriages or relationships, INDIVIDUAL relationships should be based on ones own set of values, beliefs and life experiences. For some it may be the bible or something else, but at the end of the day your relationship should be defined by your own experiences not by other peoples'. Why should the manner in which other people conduct their personal lives determine your individual lives. With that said I think each person has free will and should dance to the beat of their own drum, learn how to improve their own rhythm but that of those around them.